Officially, the strangest pick-up email I've ever received was from a semi-local individual. I wish I had taken a screenshot at the time, but I was too appalled/shocked/confused to think about it before I very quickly hit delete.
This dude just wanted me for my feet.
His opening line said that he had a longterm, loving relationship with a woman and he had no plans to ever leave her. But from my photos, he was very interested in seeing my feet.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh wha?
The email went on to talk about how he had a very deep love (psychosis) when it came to feet and he felt that mine would be beautiful. He wanted to "worship them" in a manner they most deserved, and even offered to buy them any shoes I wanted.
For those of you who don't know me. I hate feet. All feet. Mine in particular. I feel like all feet look like troll feet.
Side note. Just googled "troll feet" to find a funny image to put in here, and what the fuck, man. DO NOT google troll feet. Just no.
Now. I'll be the first to admit I wouldn't mind if someone bought me shoes. But there is no way I'm going to let some stranger have their way with my feet. I just picture a bodiless set of size nines sitting on a satin pillow (with tassels) being inappropriately fondled by Igor from Young Frankenstein.
Needless to say I hit delete, and then put on a second pair of socks.
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